Haiku about a guy i almost knew

A quick chance meeting,
I was instantly in awe
Blushing, I glanced down

Looked up, you were gone
Damn, a mirage- where’d you go?
Summer ended –sigh-

The distance endless.
Trekking down separate paths
The roads less traveled.

You found me with ease
Social Networking era,
Just type in my name

Click, type, scroll to me.
If you see me as beauty
I exhale, relieved.

Time to start living
You say lets meet for a drink
For much I’m thirsty

But until we meet
Acquainted; virtually
Just another fan

I see you daily
Study you through the T.V.
Watch you like the skies

From the privacy
Of my lonely apartment
Needing to hold you

Mostly to be held
Captive Audience: Your eyes
Such passion, nightly.

Nights at 5 and 10
News delivered to millions
Though its meant for me.

Who are you truly?
You’re the man I created.
Lots to live up to.

Transitioning

& I fear I will die
White pixie-faced
&Misunderstood
Reclusive.

Not having given all that I should
&what about change?

Will I offer progress?
Place upon the alter
A moments peace.

Will these rants
That are often
So dark
So dark
Will these rants become
Mantras?

Lift me up now
Lift me up
&I rest with you
Through these words
Of inspiration

&I Vow to try
To make amends
With my sorrow

I want to move.
I’m headed toward the light
& its warm here.